Don't get caught up in workplace negativity

March 30, 2017
Quite often we spend our lives waiting for things or people to change for us to be happy, rather than making the choice to change the one thing we have complete control of — and that would be ourselves.

I’ve come across some disturbing news. According to research, the majority of your team members spend 10 or more hours per month conducting or listening to negative conversations. (I know you would never do this.)

These team members are generally involved in negative conversations about their bosses, other members of the management team or other team members.

Even more amazing, almost a third of these employees spend 20 hours or more per month participating in those negative conversations.

I know that as you read this, some of you find it hard to believe these numbers and so did I; however, I have coached a large number of people who have been committed to this behavior, and I also found several articles that corroborated these numbers.

It really does not matter how bad your boss is or how bad the environment you are working in actually is. Spending all of this time whining and complaining about your boss and the environment makes you a part of the problem.

Your whining and complaining will never improve the relationships or the environment. There are no victims in the context of this conversation; there are only volunteers. Wherever you are, it is because you are choosing to be there.

Now, I know some of you may be thinking, “But I have no choice; I have to stay in this job.” I submit that the only thing every one of us has to do is die. I understand you need to take care of your family, pay your bills, buy groceries, pay your mortgage; however, if you choose to remain where you are, identify what is right about the people and the environment.

Taking care of your needs and the needs of your family are not an excuse to be miserable or negative about the people or environment you are working in. You can choose to find a better boss or environment if where you are is so bad. I truly believe when we start focusing on what is going right, what we like about the people and environment we are working in, everything changes.

If you don’t like how something looks, then look at it differently. When you do, what you are looking at will change.

Quite often we spend our lives waiting for things or people to change for us to be happy, rather than making the choice to change the one thing we have complete control of, and that would be ourselves.

If we spent 20 hours or more per month talking about what we are grateful for, we would become more productive, get more done, be happier, become more resilient and doing so would allow us to build positive relationships.

Many times when I have talked to people about the negativity in the workplace, they say that they are just being real, telling the truth, being honest. You must realize that you are telling your truth and it’s your real. ALL of what you are experiencing is created from your perspective, based on your expectations - many of which you have never made known. Let’s be clear, there is some good in the worst of us and some bad in the best of us.

I encourage you to consider these questions before you engage in another conversation at work:

•          Will this conversation help me do my job better?

•          Will this conversation benefit my team?

•          Will this conversation benefit the person I am speaking about?

•          How will this conversation benefit me in a positive way?

•          Will this conversation resolve the issues?

Time is an equal and fair commodity. We have all been given the same amount of time. How you spend yours will determine your ultimate successes and failures.

I encourage you to deliberately spend the next 20 hours looking for and acknowledging the things you are grateful for. Catch people doing things right and acknowledge them for it.

Choose to make wherever you are a positive, productive place because you are there and transform the real problem into the real solution.

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